They say home is where the heart is. Well about two months ago I took a decision to follow my heart and now, after a year of a long distance marriage, here I am – home.
Life has come to a full circle for me, yet it has stood absolutely still. But oddly enough, this year, while apparently futile, has had an impact in ways that I am still trying to understand.
As enumerated extensively in my previous ranting, change and I have never been good friends. And my compulsive need to strive for the perfect situation just adds to my angst because in times of uncertainty (and otherwise I now realise) those neat packages are an oasis.
For a long time, I had a sense of unease. That something was missing. I spent a lot of time questioning every aspect of my life – career, marriage, long term goals and lofty things like meaning of life, what I need to be happy, etc – the list was long and endless. Then I chose to dramatically defy the obvious flow of my life and move myself hoping that cosmic forces would relent to my perseverance. They instead chose to teach me the things i needed to know the most – I call it my seven step peace guide.
Hum Of The Day:
- Life has its flow and yet, we have the power to change that flow. The caveat is that we have to live with the implications of that change.
- The change of flow happens only for you. So all other events related to everyone in your life stay the same – leading to a weird, tumultuous life
- The way you have envisaged life is not the ideal
- When life forces decisions on you, it also gives you the power to open your eyes to whole new possibilities
- You have to develop your ability to accept new possibilities on your own – no help available from any forces
- Uncertainty or possibilities – the choice is your own. As a child you chose possibilities. As an adult – choose wisely again
- All pieces of life never ever fall in place at the same time. The process is a slow step-by-step one. But for anything to fall in place, you have to fix one move, take one step and make that a pivot for other steps to follow
Hum Of The Day:
There has been a change within me. A shift towards peace, towards acceptance and towards freedom – freedom to dream new dreams, to take on a new course of life, to explore options I never knew existed. To reignite the childlike happiness in the fact that life is what I make it. I have the power back – and I will slowly unleash my dreams one day at a time.
1 comment:
For one you need to update your blogger profile which erroneously says you are 20 something ;) lol !. Secondly am I glad that you are back in this blogging space? Oh yes ! And more importantly that your writing always strikes a chord deep within which makes reading of your blog posts so much of a experiential thing for me. For someone sailing in the same boat as you, I hope that what we see right now are mere "disconnected dots" and when we look back in life we see these dots weave a beautiful pattern which will make us smile with a sense of fulfillment. Cause I really feel nothing else really matters :) Good luck girl !
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