Lessons from Cougar Town

I recently saw this hilarious episode of Cougar Town where Jennifer Anniston is Courtney Cox’s shrink. Cox is delighted as to who her new shrink really gets her” and seems to have been there done that. Turns out, that Anniston was a loony who had assumed that Cox’s relationship with her son was easily equated with her own relationship with her dog – and on finding this out, Cox of course blows up and the shrink is out of her life.

Storyline aside, that got me thinking. We all crave empathy – to have someone who gets us, und3erstands what we have been through and therefore does not judge our emotions, does not ridicule their depth and makes us feel less crazy in a mad mad world. And usually, if get the understanding, and don’t feel crazy, we assume the situation would have been the same. End of the day, we all just crave acceptance and acknowledgement that what we feel is OK.  

So often I’m told learn to live for yourself, but “myself” is me plus the world. There is no me in isolation. The very notion of a person, without attachments, relationships, expectations, desires, and opinions – is not even human. To have a life where you do not care for any of those expectations and opinions that come with those relationships is just sad.

And no one wants sadness. So we choose acceptance as a goal. From spouses, friends, family, colleagues, bosses – anyone or maybe even all of the above! And if we get a ray of empathy through the process, it’s like balm on a wound. My only question is – why don’t more of us just carry balm and pass it along instead of waiting for someone to hand it to us.

Hum of the day:
Life is what and who you fill your days with. Consider it a blessing or a curse – the choice is yours. Just like loneliness.  Rights, privileges, obligations and responsibility – you cant choose one half without the other.